Even as a missionary, sometimes it is hard for me to figure out the best way to engage people in conversations about the gospel. I find this especially true since currently my primary “ministry,” apart from my family, is in the form of the various friendships and relationships that I have with the women in my community. These women usually aren’t coming to formal ministry events expecting a spiritual program when we spend time together, so sometimes it gets tricky to know exactly how to engage people in gospel conversations without being pushy or culturally awkward.

I am guessing that many of you are more natural evangelists than I am, but perhaps this might be an encouraging idea for those of you who very much desire to be always sharing the good news about Jesus but wish you were more naturally gifted in this way.

One thing that has given me a wide open door to the gospel with nearly every friend who has sat in my kitchen for tea for the past year is a simple project that my daughter and I did to help her memorize John 3:16. I didn’t realize at the time that this little project would end up giving me so many opportunities to share about our God who so loved the world that he gave his only son with those who do not yet believe in him.

I had originally planned to keep the project up for a couple of weeks as we usually do with projects, but after seeing what a great conversation starter it was, I decided that it is here to stay awhile.

I anticipate stumbling upon a new helpful ministry tool for myself when we made this little project, but it got me to thinking about how helpful and it is to have conversation pieces in our homes. These are things that will catch people’s eye as they are welcomed for tea or a meal and will give us an opportunity to share about the love of Christ. Your conversation piece might not be a kid’s art project with a Bible verse on it, but perhaps a more sophisticated piece of art that that can’t help but be noticed. I am sure many of you are more creative than I am and could come up with all sorts of great ideas!  I’d encourage you though, especially if you struggle to find good starting places for spiritual conversations, to make am artistic conversation piece for your home and pray that God will use it to give you more open doors for the gospel.

Do you already have any such conversation pieces in your home? Do you have any creative ideas to share? Do you have any stories about how something in your home has sparked spiritual conversation?

(Post by: Ashley)

This week I’ve been listening to a radio series on Revive our Hearts called “Daughters of Hope” with guest Michelle Rickett, the author of a book by the same title. I found it so eye opening and encouraging, and was so greatly moved to pray for our sisters in Christ around the world facing persecution that I thought I’d post it here. Each part of the series is only 25 minutes long and there are 4 parts. Likely a number of you friends are working with women in very similar circumstances as those mentioned in these messages.  Here is the description from Revive our Hearts:

Many of your sisters around the world are suffering persecution. They are denied freedom because they are women and because they profess faith in Christ. Hearing their stories will increase your perseverance and inspire your faith.

Let’s be praying for these dear women who are facing so much suffering for their faith!

(Post by: Ashley)

In my last post I shared about my vivid daydream of life in Russia before my initial arrival. I have also been thinking over a phrase that was common to my thought back in those days. My husband and I often talked together and with others about our desire to eventually  “become Russian.” This phrase “becoming Russian” was birthed out of the desire to follow Paul’s example of becoming all things to all people for the sake of soul salvation. It came from a willingness to leave what is comfortable and adopt what is foreign because God had called us to it. It was based in some good desires, but I wouldn’t say that I have the same vision today for what it looks like to live as a successful missionary.

In my hometown of Seattle at Pike Place Market

Upon arrival, I quickly learned that a person from one culture being dropped into another doesn’t spontaneously undergo some sort of culture osmosis with the concentration of cultures eventually flowing in or out to make a of perfect cultural balance. I must have somewhat expected the American-ness to just flow right out of me when it was not culturally valued or fitting, and the Russian-ness to just flow right in where needed. I didn’t fully anticipate going through painful transplant surgery when I needed to learn how to be more Russian. Having to adjust to the Russian concept of time and commitment, for example, felt like just such a transplant. I am still not sure that the transplant has taken because I continue to fight off feelings of anger and frustration when I am left waiting alone at a cafe or when someone calls at the last minute to tell me that they aren’t coming over when I’ve worked hard to clean the house and prepare a dessert for tea.

And besides the little petty things like our concept of time, or sense of fashion (though I have to admit that Russian fashion is growing on me), there are more significant values at my very core that I simply cannot will myself to forsake. I believe now that some of these things are essential to who God has created me to be over the course of my upbringing and are worth preserving.

After a time of struggling through my desire to fit in but feeling wrong about tossing aside my own culture, and with the help of some good discussion with friends who never even considered the idea of wanting to “become Russian” (and not at all because they don’t love Russia), I came to understand more that I don’t have to trade one culture for the other in order to love Russia and Russians, or even to gain a good cultural understanding.

What a simple and freeing thought that was, as I often felt quite out of place and just plain different, especially in that first year or so! In my circle of missionary friends, we often toss around the phrase “not wrong, just different” in order to keep ourselves from criticizing the culture in which we live (a very important view to have in a lot of circumstance, in my opinion), but I see how this phrase absolutely relates to me as an American living in another culture as well. Just because I am not made up of the same cultural core material, my difference is not necessarily wrong!

With this freedom, I feel more able to seek simply to love Russia, to learn about Russian culture, to seek to understand the Russian mindset and be able to filter things through a new understanding, but I can let myself off of the hook a bit and enjoy and celebrate my American-ness, even in the moments where I feel a bit more different than I’d like.

Much to my own surprise, as I’ve allowed myself to enjoy the process of learning about my host culture rather than pressuring myself “become Russian,”  God has allowed cultural adaptation to start feeling a lot more like natural osmosis and much less like transplant surgery. Some parts of my American culture that don’t serve me well here  can gradually be put aside, even if just for a time,  and after awhile, aspects of Russian culture have become more normal and often preferable for life here.  I don’t expect to become 100% Russian, but my love for and understanding of Russia and Russians is ever growing, and seeing this continue is my new goal and desire.

My common attire during the cold Russian winters

How have you viewed your own cultural difference in light of your host culture? Have you felt a desire to become more like your host culture? Has this been a difficult process? Have you resisted adopting aspects of your host culture or struggled to keep a “not wrong, just different” attitude?  How about experiences with becoming overly critical of your own home culture after learning to love your new one?

(Post by: Ashley)

I remember my daydream years back before our little family had moved to Russia. I had spent a summer in Russia previously, but I really had no idea what life here would be like, and especially life as a family with a baby. Being the optimist that I am, despite the worries of leaving family and familiarity, my imaginary future life was bright and vivid. I can still see the crisp image in my mind of the home that I imagined I would have, and the life that I would soon lead.

My quaint little imaginary home was bright and inviting with a little kitchen that opened up to our living room, perfect for frequent hospitality. The sun shone in the windows (really this was not as fanciful as it sounds since we were to move to southern Russia that is indeed quite sunny and bright), and I would sit there on the couch with my new Russian friends sipping tea out of little blue and white china tea cups, sharing deeply about our lives and talking about the gospel. I am not particularly prone to daydreaming, but for some reason this image remains vivid in my mind.

What a shock it was to enter our new apartment for the first time, dead exhausted in every way, and to walk into our dark, dingy flat late on that first night. I had always considered myself relatively adaptable, as does anyone planning to leave family and culture for the international mission field, but as my eyes beheld these first images of my new home, the tears defied my will to hold them back. The furniture and decor was all very dark, the ceilings were low, electrical sockets practically hung out of the wall, and the dirt was abundant. The windows of my tiny kitchen were on the dark side of the building  crossed with iron bars, and the dishes were chipped and mis-matching and not enough in number to create a set even for our little family of three, let alone containing a beautiful set of ornate blue and white tea cups.

And not only did the reality of my home contrast so sharply with the new Russian home of my daydream, but the reality of my new ministry was also just as strikingly different. I could hardly say, “Hello, my name is Ashley,” let alone have a heart-to-heart in Russian. And my supposed “natural language ability” proved to be quite circumstantial. This ability existed in a past life where I studied language for over 20 hours a week, without kids…. learning Chinese. Studying Russian a few hours a week with a baby did not pan out quite the same. Rarely did anyone come to sit on my couch for tea, let alone to hear the gospel, and I wondered how on earth I would ever be a thriving and fruitful missionary .

I remember the feelings of sadness, disappointment, frustration, and even hopelessness as I began this life that seemed far less beautiful or fruitful than I had daydreamed. I wondered and prayed if God would ever fill my living room with friends for tea and opportunities for the gospel, but honestly it seemed quite a long ways off. I was thrilled to love and serve my husband to enable him to have a fruitful ministry, but was there ever going to be an opportunity for me to really feel like I too was a part?

The memory of this daydream and the feelings that came so strongly after I first arrived in Russia are what made a gift that I received last night in my kitchen over tea with friends so incredibly special. My dearest Russian friend, not yet a believer but with whom God has blessed me with true friendship, many heart-to-heart talks over tea, and conversations about the gospel, brought me a set of lovely blue and white china tea cups. She had no idea about the little daydream of my past, so to receive these little cups, just like I had imagined, from such a truly dear friend, is such a vivid and perfect picture to me of the Lord’s amazing grace in my life here in Russia. He has provided friends, he has provided a ministry that even I with all of my limitations can do, and He has even provided the blue and white china tea cups to remind me of His grace. God didn’t have to do it that way to remind me of His plan and power and perfection, but how incredibly grateful I am for this special display of His love.

Do you remember your imaginary life on the field before you set foot in your new country? Does that image differ from the reality of the life that you stepped into? How has God shown you grace in this life that is perhaps not what you had expected, but all the same His perfect will?

(Post by: Ashley)

From Shilo, missionary to Paraguay currently on home assignment: What things have you given your ministry partners as thank you gifts?  Do you find that consumable gifts are best?  Or do you try to find something representative of your country of service?  If so, how do you find something that also suits American tastes of decorating and won’t just be put away into a closet somewhere?

(If you would like to pose a “Tuesday Topic” question, please email it to formissionarymoms@gmail.com . Provide your blog address if you would like to be linked to, and specify also if you would like to remain anonymous. Thanks!)

From Noelle in Kenya: I have been thinking about your post on being thankful for the simplicity of life on the mission field, and it has got me thinking about other things I am thankful for. I am thankful that we get to see wild animals all the time, so my daughter can learn their names and what they look like in person. I am thankful that I get to spend so much quality family time with my husband and daughter. I’m thankful that some things are much cheaper here: doctors, fruits & vegetables and nice restaurants. So, I’m wondering what other missionary moms are thankful for…?

(If you would like to pose a “Tuesday Topic” question, please email it to formissionarymoms@gmail.com . Provide your blog address if you would like to be linked to, and specify also if you would like to remain anonymous. Thanks!)

…..Sam who blogs over at Samantha Today! Congratulations Sam! We hope this book is a blessing to you! (You’ll be receiving an email soon!)

And we hope and pray that each of you have experienced profound joy in your relationship with God during this season of giving thanks!

If you haven’t yet entered the giveaway for Ann Voskamp’s book, “One Thousand Gifts,” be sure to leave a comment on Shilo’s post, “Thankful for Yellow and Brown Swirl Carpet!” We’ll be drawing a winner by the end of the 28th in the western hemisphere!

With Thanksgiving fast approaching, I’ve been pondering the difference that a heart full of gratitude makes in how we view our homes.  Read on to find out why I see our current home differently than all those before it. 

We’d never weathered such a storm. I’d been sick before but this was different.  Three weeks bedridden confirmed what before we had only suspected.  Multiple sclerosis was now in the ship with us and it wasn’t smooth sailing.

In the midst of the tumult, we were convinced of one thing.  We needed to return to the US for medical attention and we needed to do it quickly.  MS was hardly known in our country of service and we needed the God given wisdom of experienced physicians.

We booked our tickets and made our appointments and packed up our house and parked our car and shipped off our dog and cried our goodbyes and tried to leave well and clung with all our strength to the God who is good and only does good (And doesn’t leaving always feel like one long run on sentence?  It absolutely takes your breath away).

We had very little idea of what life would look like when we landed, but we had confidence that God was leading us.  And wow, what a spectacular experience to walk in the way that He had prepared for us.  From the hugs and concern of our friends, to the comfortable, dependable car, to the earlier doctor’s appointments, to the food shower, to the rent free housing in the exact place we love to land, His grace was everywhere, abounding. We didn’t deserve any of it.  It was all too much.  It was only His grace.

I could write a post on each of those things, but it was my response to our house that surprised me most.  It’s a great house despite the fact that the front door doesn’t open unless you kick it, the curtains have all shrunk and are no longer floor length, the windows are drafty, the paint on the walls is scuffed and there’s brown and yellow swirl carpet in the kitchen.

At other times in my life that would have been a list of complaints, but this time it’s just a list.  I truly can’t bring myself to utter one complaint about this house in spite of the stylistic and cosmetic quirks.

There’s only one explanation for this complete shift in my perspective:  When my heart is continually overwhelmed with thankfulness for God’s abounding grace to me, I see things differently.  Thankfulness changes my perspective.  How else can you explain the fact that I actually laughed out loud when I saw the psychedelic kitchen carpet for the first time?  J  Thankfulness allows me to lighten up, minimizing the material, so I can focus on what’s truly important, the fact that God has been so exceedingly kind to my family.

I’m not saying that I have stopped caring about making my home beautiful or that I’ll be putting down brown and yellow swirl carpet in my dream house.  Thankfulness doesn’t ask us to forsake our God given desire to create beauty.  Thankfulness ushers us toward a greater perception of God’s goodness, inviting us to see to the beauty BEYOND the material, to search for the grace of our precious Lord Jesus in every imperfection who alone can redeem all things. 

Modern day poet and passionate proclaimer of grace, Ann Voskamp sums it up this way in her book One Thousand Gifts: “When I realize that it is not God who is in my debt but I who am in His great debt, then doesn’t all become gift?”

How else could brown and yellow carpet or multiple sclerosis be a gift, except that I’m filled with gratitude for His overwhelming grace towards me.

Are you missing His grace to you simply because it’s wrapped in an imperfect or even undesirable package?  Will you join me on the path of thankfulness to a greater awakening to His abundant grace?  

 A heart of thanksgiving is something we all desire.  One blessed reader will receive a  copy of Ann’s powerful, life changing book, One Thousand Gifts to encourage them along that path!   To enter, just answer the question above or leave any comment on this post.  Pass the word on to your fellow missionary moms for an extra entry (If you do this, please leave a separate comment letting us know!).  There are no geographical restrictions.  The winner will be drawn on Monday, November 28th!

(Post by: Shilo)

I have realized that I derive and unusual amount of satisfaction from going to the doctor here in Russia. I don’t really enjoy anything medical and generally avoid doctors when at all possible, and I certainly don’t enjoy subjecting my children to jabs in the arm with needles, but each time I step out of the office I find myself in an unusually fabulous mood.  Isn’t that weird?! I think I have recently realized the reason for this strange satisfaction.

When we first moved overseas, one of the nightmares that I would envision in my mind was if something terrible happened to one of my children when nobody was around and I had to be the one to find the way to the hospital and to communicate with the doctors. My child’s well-being would be in my hands and at the mercy of doctors being able to decipher my terrible Russian.

My language abilities have grown a lot since those first weeks and months though, taking away a lot of that utterly helpless feeling that I had back then. I’ve also learned systems, transportation, and just generally more of how things work in this culture.  Now things like going to the doctor are fairly simple, doable tasks. And though simple, it still feels like a huge victory as it signifies that I have grown in my ability to fend for myself and care for my family in this foreign land.

So, though I don’t actually enjoy doctor’s visits in the most part, I do enjoy the tangible awareness of progress.

What situations in your life signify progress for you in overseas living?

(Post by: Ashley)